Firsts

lifestyle

Hey folks and fans. It’s been a minute, but I finally have wifi in my FIRST APARTMENT. That’s right. I moved two weeks ago into a real fixer upper of a one bedroom apartment. I started with low expectations of both myself and the space, but after two weeks of a little bit of work each day it’s coming together. Of course, I couldn’t do it without help from friends and family, specifically my mom, Dave (my mom’s boyfriend) and Nick (my boyfriend). You can see some of my projects, additions and adventures (when I remember to post) on Instagram @picturemarcella.

Along with the FIRST apartment comes my FIRST electrical bills, FIRST internet bills and FIRST furniture purchases, which have all been their own unique version of exciting. That really sums up my FIRST apartment. It’s hard work, and you need to be a bit of a pain in the ass to get things done (ie. get your landlord to fix your sink) BUT it’s all part of the life lessons that come with being in your early 20’s. The squeaky wheel gets the oil, right?

My next FIRST is having my FIRST article published at my current job. I had the opportunity to drink beer on a boat and I wrote all about it here. I work in marketing, but once in a while a fun assignment will pop up with my name all over it (look out for the hard cider pairing chart coming out soon). Food has always been a passion, and I’ve had a knack for writing since I was published in my town’s local newspaper at age 11 (for a sports story, imagine that). I never imagined that I would be so heavily associated with the beer scene in the Hudson Valley, but since my sample article for my job application was about the local hiking & beer scene, it’s been my claim to fame around the office. I’ve got no problems with it.

I absolutely love my job. I come into work every day ready to put my best foot forward and contribute to the local farm, food and beverage scene. It inspires me to read about, write about and experience the food and drink cultures around me. I want to somehow do it all and I’m not sure where to start: wine, beer, meat, cheese, agriculture—there’s so much involved! Since I’ve been plowing through books (currently on Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat—amazing, btw) please let me know if there are any smart reads on any of the above subjects. What are the holy texts of food? Contribute to my list of FIRSTS, give me some tips!

I’ve been on a journey

lifestyle

It’s been a long time. Much has happened. I went to Austria for 10 days, got a job when I returned and have been living in an ether of neither here nor there for almost a month. I went on my second interview two days after I came back from Austria and was offered the position on the next Monday which meant I had one week to figure it out.

It was Friday July 13 when I drove up to spend the weekend with my boyfriend with about 3 weeks of clothes packed in preparation. It was hot out. I drove for about 3 hours to get to my first destination of many to follow. I didn’t know how to pack for what I was about to experience. On the next Monday I drove back, another 2 hours, to spend the next few days with a family I grew very close with. I started my new job on Tuesday.

I dedicate this interlude to how much I love my job. It’s part-time for now (which I don’t love) but it might possibly be the perfect first job for me. I write about food, I talk about food and I think about food. That’s what I do. On some days I’m making phone calls and drafting emails. On other days I’m asking for a cider pairing recommendation. I’m at the epicenter of a farm-to-table movement, and I’m stoked to participate in the facilitation of the movement.

ANYWAY, I had to leave at some point. I’ll admit, I felt like that family accepted me as a part of their family. A tiny addition. I wanted to cry when I left because, honestly, it was my last shred of stability before the uncertainty of the next few weeks settled in. I left to go on another weekend adventure with my boyfriend. We went to Vermont, and truly I needed some peace. For the record, as of this point I only knew I had a second place to stay. So you can imagine that I could’ve laughed into tears at any point during this weekend.

My next stop, a temporary sublet. A friend of a friend offered her student housing for the month she’d be away before school started again. So here I am. In a room full of pictures of smiling friends, none of which are me. My suitcase is still on the floor. When I’m too alone, I feel it in my soul. Sometimes I can’t be rational about my feelings. I’m wearing a mask that says “I have everything under control” when I’m at work. But until just two days ago I had very few things under control. But two days ago I figured out a little more of the puzzle.

Two days ago I got approved for my first apartment. It needs some love I’ll give it that, but it’s my stability for the foreseeable future. I mean I can put my clothes in a closet and lay in a bed with a blanket that covers the entire mattress (and not my twin-size, powerpuff girl fleece blanket).

Now the last thing…that whole “part-time” bit. I’m working on it. I’m interviewing for any and all positions that need me. I’m giving BS answers to why I’m passionate about being a cashier. But simply I need the money. At least until I can finesse my beloved part-time job into a full-time job.

My mom said life is just a bunch of problems you need to figure it out. Or something like that. So I’m figuring it out. I’m discovering new things about myself–about what I love–and I’m excited about it. I’m scared but very, very excited.

The alone time ebbs and flows between empowering and lonely. One night I can feel the haunting silence of an empty four bedroom apartment creeping in around me, and the next day I could thrive in the sunlight making my rounds through the farmer’s market on my own. I haven’t felt this way since my adjustment to Florence over a year and a half ago. And yet, that was the beginning of the best transformation I’ve undergone in my short life. Which is why I’m excited. I know that these feelings of uncertainty and doubt can yield the best moments.